I went to the Omani Women's Symposium. Even though there have been other conferences dedicated to women in Oman in the past, this was described as being the first of its kind, and was even advertised in the newspapers. It is wonderful that dialogue like this is becoming more and more prevalent in the Sultanate, and that issues pertaining to women are being brought to the surface continually. Every year, there is a specified goal to work towards improving, and this year is the year of the woman. I was really looking forward to the conference, and the first of the two nights did not disappoint. The women who gave their presentations were full of passion and personal experience - many were researchers and lawyers. I was taken by their bold statements and yet respectful discussion of Omani culture. The question session was particularly interesting - many of the statements made by the men left me dumbfounded that they could be so oblivious to the visible differences in opportunities between men and women in the political and the social spheres. Or that they truly believed that women had more political limitations especially in terms of marriage, because women are clearly emotional -OH! DO YOU THINK SO? - see? you're emotional. - ...
This got my blood boiling. Many times you read about these issues and living as an outsider within Oman, I have only seen a small percentage of these issues first hand, and the political ones that are below the surface are not always the most visible. Even in my interviews so far, the situations for each girl is different and depends in great deal on the conservativeness of the girl's family and especially on whether or not she has a car. I have always taken for granted the rights that I never fought for - not only being allowed, but expected to go to college, being given a car, allowed to go out every night if I wanted, marriage is optional and up to me to decide when and to whom, many of my best friends are guys, I can aspire to be whatever I want, and no one tells me habibati, leave that to the men... - just to name a few. This doesn't even touch on legal aspects, which is an entirely new conversation, but i would love to see my new girlfriends here in Oman with the same opportunities that I've had. It hurts me to leave my friend at home while I go out with her relatives because she is so careful not to do anything that might make her unwanted by a husband or leave for city center to work, and my mom stays at home all day with the kids practically locked inside with no car. Some people are ok with this and call it culture - that is fine, but not every girl wants to grow up to inherit these expectations and I think it's time to start asking for a different and more accommodating social structure. Women these days are starting to become lawyers, doctors, researchers and they are tired of people not wanting to invest in them because they will have babies one day. You can disagree, and post your own view that's fine. I am also aware that I am a young woman from the West and have naturally entered into this society with my own biases. The thing is, it is just not fair. Why not allow women equal rights as men when the laws are founded upon Shari'a law which proclaims that women and men are equal. I loved what one of the women said in particular. She said, stop asking me to prove to you that my suggestions for equal rights fit into Shari'a law; I would like you to prove to me that they don't.
Monday, November 16, 2009
Thursday, November 12, 2009
stories
Our final exam and final day of class was Monday. Now it is ISP time. My research project is about how Oman's development has influenced the empowerment of women here. Oman has gone from having nothing to everything it is today in about the past 40 years and it was all due to oil. I would like to interview grandmothers and their granddaughters to better understand how this development has impacted the opportunities available to Omani women. (If you have any suggestions/ideas/questions/literature I should look into PLEASE e-mail me rdodd@austincollege.edu)
After school that last day I went home with a friend of mine in the program to her hostfamilies house to interview her sister. We got home, had coffee and temours, talked for a bit and they decided I would spend the night. I had the interview with her about her life and opportunities in Oman later that night slumber party style, sitting on her bed sipping tea. The next day we woke up late, had some visitors, and before we knew it, it was dark and there was talk of going to the grandmother's village the next day. She was the next person on my list of people to interview, so again I spent the night. We baked apple pie, visited the sister's academy and played truth or dare until the early hours of the morning. The next day we went to a symphony concert by the Royal Omani Symphony Orchestra. This was followed by lunch, then snacks, and finally at sun set we began our journey to the village.
I had an amazing time. Every weekend all of the benat (girls) in the family gather at the grandmothers house to spend time together. We all gathered together on mats for dinner and conversation. I spent this time interviewing the grandmother with her daughters and granddaughters gathered all around her listening intently and adding their inputs when needed. After the grandmother went to sleep, the older Aunties had everyone circle around under the stars and told stories. We heard a haunted story first that happened to a friend of the Aunt's, then it went into a series of stories about Oman in the olden days about the grandmother and about their weddings. They talked about the games they would play for fun and we all reenacted them together. It was so much fun! By that point I felt so warmly included in the family and was joking around, and slapping hands with the women from age 5 to 75. It's interesting; as much as Oman has changed in the past 40 years, there are some aspects such as these gatherings and the storytelling that for women are almost exactly the same and I hope never change. It was sad leaving this morning, and I hope to go back again before I leave. I know not all of my interviews will be so interactive, but this trip has made me excited to get going on my research.
After school that last day I went home with a friend of mine in the program to her hostfamilies house to interview her sister. We got home, had coffee and temours, talked for a bit and they decided I would spend the night. I had the interview with her about her life and opportunities in Oman later that night slumber party style, sitting on her bed sipping tea. The next day we woke up late, had some visitors, and before we knew it, it was dark and there was talk of going to the grandmother's village the next day. She was the next person on my list of people to interview, so again I spent the night. We baked apple pie, visited the sister's academy and played truth or dare until the early hours of the morning. The next day we went to a symphony concert by the Royal Omani Symphony Orchestra. This was followed by lunch, then snacks, and finally at sun set we began our journey to the village.
I had an amazing time. Every weekend all of the benat (girls) in the family gather at the grandmothers house to spend time together. We all gathered together on mats for dinner and conversation. I spent this time interviewing the grandmother with her daughters and granddaughters gathered all around her listening intently and adding their inputs when needed. After the grandmother went to sleep, the older Aunties had everyone circle around under the stars and told stories. We heard a haunted story first that happened to a friend of the Aunt's, then it went into a series of stories about Oman in the olden days about the grandmother and about their weddings. They talked about the games they would play for fun and we all reenacted them together. It was so much fun! By that point I felt so warmly included in the family and was joking around, and slapping hands with the women from age 5 to 75. It's interesting; as much as Oman has changed in the past 40 years, there are some aspects such as these gatherings and the storytelling that for women are almost exactly the same and I hope never change. It was sad leaving this morning, and I hope to go back again before I leave. I know not all of my interviews will be so interactive, but this trip has made me excited to get going on my research.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
khubz Oman and dirty dishes
I spent the last week in an area outside of Nizwa. Nizwa is one of Oman's larger cities, and in 2020 is set to be the cultural capital of the Middle East. The girl's were placed in host families and the boys, considering Nizwa and its surrounding area is more conservative than Muscat, stayed with male students studying in Universities in Nizwa. I was placed with a wonderful family. I became very good friends with the 15 year old daughter, and had a wonderful time playing football and basketball with the three little boys. I shared a room with the three boys, the 15 year old girl and 20 year old who is married to one of the older sons (none of whom I ever met). I was strongly encouraged by the mother to wear a scarf during the entire week, and I enjoyed helping out with household chores which included washing the dishes. Cooking for the entire family requires the largest pots I've ever seen. They do not fit in the sink - it took all week for me to perfect my method. I also got to help feed the goats, shew away the army of cats outside the kitchen door as we cooked on the floor, and helped prepare Khubz Oman. Khubz Oman was probably one of my favorite parts of the Nizwa experience. It is the thinnest bread I've ever seen. Making it requires grabbing an entire handful of dough and slapping it onto the hot surfaced contraption we had set up on the floor of the kitchen. After slapping the pan about 10 times, you are left with the residue and then you CAREFULLY peel it off the pan, drizzle it with oil and then hallas, youre done. I began to get worried about my host mother's hand getting burned in the process, and around the same time I was wondering about the broken tape floating in the water she was using. Just then she said "Ow!" for the last time, grabbed the broken tape and used a new method for making the khubz that resembled making a crepe - only with a broken tape. I hope this is not the last time that I witness a broken tape being used as a cooking utensil.
Unlike other girls in my program, I got to leave the house. This was a big deal. My family took me to another family member's house, where an engagement lunch was celebrating three new brides (aroose) in the family. The purpose of the lunch was to get to know the new girls and welcome them into the family. This took me almost the entire afternoon to understand. It was a wonderful chance to practice my Arabic, considering a very few people speak English. The best part of the afternoon was when I described my friends and family in America ALL IN ARABIC! and they all understood and said, "Meshallalah! you know a lot! in sha allah, Arabic will be very easy for you." This was nice to hear, despite the fact that I knew that what I had just said was not really that impressive. They had very low expectations. I made friends with many of the women and I had a great time looking at the bride's wedding pictures.
During our tour of Nizwa Tech University I met an incredible student there. She was great to talk to and it was interesting hearing her perspective on men, work, marriage and women's roles.
Our week in Nizwa ended with a tour of Jabel Shams and Jabel Akhdar (two mountains). They were beautiful. We got to look over the sides of many cliffs and walk through a few wadies and went through the first cave tour in the gulf region. It was a fun week, but I missed my Muscat host family and was warmly welcomed by them when I returned. I spent that evening getting caught up with my host mom on family gossip and shared my experience in Nizwa with her and listened to rap songs with my host dad - back to the regular routine.
Unlike other girls in my program, I got to leave the house. This was a big deal. My family took me to another family member's house, where an engagement lunch was celebrating three new brides (aroose) in the family. The purpose of the lunch was to get to know the new girls and welcome them into the family. This took me almost the entire afternoon to understand. It was a wonderful chance to practice my Arabic, considering a very few people speak English. The best part of the afternoon was when I described my friends and family in America ALL IN ARABIC! and they all understood and said, "Meshallalah! you know a lot! in sha allah, Arabic will be very easy for you." This was nice to hear, despite the fact that I knew that what I had just said was not really that impressive. They had very low expectations. I made friends with many of the women and I had a great time looking at the bride's wedding pictures.
During our tour of Nizwa Tech University I met an incredible student there. She was great to talk to and it was interesting hearing her perspective on men, work, marriage and women's roles.
Our week in Nizwa ended with a tour of Jabel Shams and Jabel Akhdar (two mountains). They were beautiful. We got to look over the sides of many cliffs and walk through a few wadies and went through the first cave tour in the gulf region. It was a fun week, but I missed my Muscat host family and was warmly welcomed by them when I returned. I spent that evening getting caught up with my host mom on family gossip and shared my experience in Nizwa with her and listened to rap songs with my host dad - back to the regular routine.
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